Today I want to share a little adoptee humor. Back-story: my eldest brother married my sister-in-law (who is Indian) back in 2003.
A while ago I was in L.A. visiting with my two brothers (also Korean adoptees), and our parents (who are both Caucasian). During that visit we were all out shopping one day, it was very crowded and my sister-in-law and dad were standing in the checkout line while the rest of us shopped around.
When we had later re-grouped she told us about their interaction. Even though she and my eldest brother had been married for several years, at that point, she had never referred to my parents as mom or dad.
When they had been standing there someone was trying to get by my dad so she tried to get his attention.
“Dad…” she said.
He didn’t hear her.
“Dad, someone is trying to get around you.” It was so noisy he still didn’t hear her so she gave up being brave trying to call her father-in-law “dad” for the day.
When she told my brothers and I the story, my other brother piped in laughing and said, “that must have looked pretty funny to people…you (my sister-in-law who is Indian) calling him “dad.”
We all stopped dead, looked at each other and laughed. We asked him, “uh…funnier than when we call him dad?”
My brother thought about it for a second, laughed and said, “I guess not.”
If you knew my brother then you could really appreciate how funny we found his comment. He is hotheaded, stocky and muscular in build and never had the best relationship with our parents growing up, but nonetheless still sees them unquestionably as their son. It, seemingly, had never occurred to him that it would look odd to others when he referred to our parents as mom and dad.
It’s funny how situations so familiar to you, in your life, don’t seem at all out of the ordinary until you take a step back and assess how those, less familiar, might perceive it.
Happy Monday and thanks for reading!